Whole 30 Day 25

25 days in and feeling good. Pretty sure I haven't lost a pound but that's not my main focus. I just wanted to change my relationship with food.

I FEEL better emotionally and physically. My pants are fitting again finally. Please excuse my Mommy Pooch in the next photo. It's the part of my body that NEVER gets smaller..not even when I was 108 lbs! These jeans were uncomfortably snug when I started this round of Whole 30. I've also seen some nice back muscle progression but I'm not sharing that photo here. ;)

I don't crave sugary junk anymore. That's been pretty awesome! I even got the wine shipment in from my fave winery in CA...not tempted a bit.

Crossfit has been going pretty well. I'm committed to lower weights/better form! I ran last weekend with ZERO pain! So stoked to get back to running again!  Also been participating in a rowing challenge. That's been interesting. I'm not dead last in the masters division so that's awesome! ;) Told hubby I'd like to invest in a home rower someday when finances allow. I look forward to finding my zen spot on long row's like yesterday's 7500 meters. Ugh!

Been eating lots of amazing local, seasonal foods (and some not so local). I'm totally in love with Olykraut...like kind of obsessed with it. I always hated kraut growing up. My Grandma would cook it and I'd flee the house from the fart smells as it was cooking! We've also tried a bunch of new to us Winter veggies. Most of them I'm totally in love with! It's been really fun experimenting. I like to hit up Wobbly Cart at the Oly Farmer's Market on Saturdays. They have this awesome $20 market special. Basically you fork over $20 and they give you a bunch of delish, organic, in season produce. You don't get to choose what you want so it definitely challenges me to find new recipes.

Food porn pics below!

Til next time!

Whole 30 Update

On day 18 of our extended Whole 30. Feeling REALLY good. My energy is through the roof (though my strength is still off but I think that's more from the break I took), I have zero sugar cravings and I'm feeling MUCH less stressed/depressed than I was. My belly isn't bloated anymore and pants are fitting straight out the dryer! Whoooo!

I'm really taking this time to think about my relationship with food. In past Whole 30 rounds I've subbed dates and dried fruit (still very sugary) for junky treats to scratch the itch so to speak. This time I've been much more strict. I've had an RX bar a couple of times only as an emergency snack and yesterday I had a few handfuls of Go Raw lemon "cookies". I thought about WHY I was eating those SWYPO cookies yesterday and decided not to buy them anymore. I wasn't hungry, I just wanted something treat like.  

I never realized what an emotional eater I am. Feeling sad? Grab a snack! Feeling happy? Celebrate with a snack! Feeling tired? Grab a snack. Gym or race PR? Grab a snack!  Instead of evaluating and figuring out WHY I was feeling the way I was, I'd have something to eat. Even if it was something small...it was still a habit I had. Now I ask myself "are you REALLY hungry?" If I am, I eat. If I'm not, I skip it! I still don't have an issue making banana and egg pancakes occasionally but I'm not making "technically" compliant treats because I'll eat them just to eat them.

I've noticed that with all the good food I've been eating I've not been anywhere near as hangry as before! Normally I wake up gnawing my arm off. The past several days I've not been hungry until a couple of hours have passed by. Same with post workout...I'm just not starving like I'd normally be. I guess all that good fuel is getting put to good use by my body! I'm digging the way I'm feeling.

My plan is to do a SLOW reintroduction. I'll start with red wine on Valentine's day. Several days later I'll try dairy...then grains..so on and so forth. I'll really evaluate how each thing impacts my body so I can decide if its worth keeping around. I plan to continue eating this way most of the time with occasion treats. I know it's not for everyone. I get that. I just FEEL better and that's what matters to me. I'm about to step up my running again (you guys, I'm SO excited..I can't even begin to explain) so I'll need to adjust my food as needed. I'll have to play around with

that once I get started.

Obligatory food porn pic--

Tapping Out

I appreciate the sentiment behind the above motivational picture, I truly do. Today, however, I decided to be a quitter. When I first started crossfit a few months ago I had the goal to do it competitively. I, naively, went into it thinking it would be like running where it just "clicked" and poof I was an athlete. I registered for my first competition which is on January 30th. Well, fast forward to today. I realized that I'm not ready, in any capacity . I still can't snatch or overhead squat worth a shit and the list goes on and on and on. My body is not ready. My mind is not ready and frankly, my heart isn't in it. I've just stressed myself out trying to figure out how to make it all happen in next to no time flat. I didn't think about or understand that most of the folks competing have been working at crossfit for years.

My teammate is cool. Fortunately someone far more prepared is able to step up and take my place. I'm happy about that. My hubby is nothing but supportive. He even praised me for making the RIGHT choice. We all know my tendency to be willful and to get injured trying to do something I'm not capable of doing. My awesome friend who is also a crossfit coach pretty much had the same reaction as hubby. She reminded me that there's no rush. This isn't the only competition in the world. I have time to focus on competing if at some point in the future it's what I want to do. I'm not going anywhere and neither is crossfit.

Right now I'm pondering this-- Am I teaching my son it's ok to give up? Or am I teaching him that being smart about what you decide to ask your body to do is the best choice? I don't know. Part of me knows this is the best choice, the other part...the competitor part....is telling me I'm a no good cry baby and that I don't deserve for anyone to take me seriously. Why should they? I'm just a middle aged Mom who can't follow through with things she commits to. I know. That part of me is MEAN and says awful things. But, I'm being real here.

So, I sit at my laptop, putting it out here for you all. Not really seeking answers, ridicule or praise. Just putting it out here for all to see. Today I chose to be a quitter. I hope that I'll be stronger and better for it in the end. 

The Journey Continues

 Happy 2016 everyone! Holy crap that feels crazy to type. I've been tossing around lots of ideas for posts in my head for a while now. Decided to get off my ass and just do it. This might be a bit random so forgive me.

 We are settled in well to Olympia and still loving it. We even love the rainy, overcast weather. My family is healthy and happy. Can't ask for much more than that right?

Since this is my fitness blog, I'll go ahead and get to the point. I'm still on a break from running..not sure if I'll ever get back to where I was before. Not sure if I truly want to. I miss it for sure but I don't think I ever want to run distance (half marathon or more) again. I don't think my knees will let me! I think I need to just get out there and go..slow and low til I gauge how my body will react.

I finally decided to get over my fears and join crossfit. It has been a humbling and frustrating several months. I thought I was in decent shape til I started working out at the box. I have SO much to learn and walking into a new sport at age 42 has been hard. I feel like I don't belong there sometimes since I'm not younger and stronger. I keep on chugging away though. I've learned to do some things I never could before and that's been fun.

 

I've also cried and been angry with myself SO many times...I still struggle with a lot of the movements and have quickly learned that those things will take a LOT of time, practice and patience. I can truly say with all my heart that I HATE snatches and overhead squats. HATE THEM! I thought I wanted to compete but truthfully, I just want to ENJOY working out. I want to get stronger and be a better athlete. I hope that can come from the time spent at crossfit. I have SO much work to do still. I signed up for a competition at the end of this month but I'm totally waffling on the idea. I don't feel ready at all. I don't want to disappoint my coaches, my partner or myself with a poor performance. :( Days like today where I can hardly get a weight that should be nothing over my head really make me doubt myself.

I keep reminding myself, especially on frustrating days like today, that my journey to now has been a long one..it hasn't been easy and I EARNED the right to be where I'm at right now. I'm allowed to keep pushing and to keep trying to attain my goals. It doesn't matter than I'm not 25 or that I'm not an elite athlete...I deserve to be where I'm at trying to make the changes I want to make!

We threw down over Christmas break. I ate a lot of sugar, drank a lot of adult beverages, ate cheese like it was my job and took a few weeks off to be with my family since my Mom came to visit. Hubby and I decided that we were going to do an extended Whole 30 from Jan 1st to Feb 14th. My first few days went as they typically do...felt good, then tired, now a bit puny with sugar cravings. I am in the process of pushing the healthy fats to get my body doing what it needs to do. I have already lost a good bit of the "eating like an a-hole" bloat so that's cool. Here are a few obligatory Whole 30 food porn pics for you guys

So, that's where I'm at right now. Eating good stuff but still sort of stuck in a negative place with regards to fitness. One day at a time, one rep at a time right? :) Til next time....